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Choosing You: Is it really that Simple?

About 3 years ago I left a relationship and a series of narratives behind as I stepped forward into my "new" life. Quite honestly these moments of metamorphosis had happened so much, and so often that by the time this moment came around I wasn't shocked or stunned, I was ready. I will never forget my partner at the time sitting across from me and saying, "You are about to go on this amazing journey, and I don't think I am coming with you."

At the time I had no interest in hearing it, I didn't want to believe that I could handle a journey solo. In fact, for most of my life I was banking on going along with someone else on THEIR journey in the hopes that one day I might feel ready to take my own. Everything ended as it usually did, with me feeling like I had no choice but to step forward and the ground on which I had previously walked, falling away. I was good at this part, no matter how much I made it seem difficult, I had trudged this portion of my journey over, and over, and over.

I started again, however, there was something different about this time. This time I wasn't in search of the next adventure I could latch onto, I was actually starting to consider what my own adventure might be like. The part that I kept getting stuck on was, "what if I get it wrong?" I remember speaking with a friend of mine regarding my fear of choosing something for me.

"What if it doesn't work out? What if I fail? What if everyone stares at me while I eat alone and they think I'm a loser?"

"Yeah that might happen," my friend responded, "You will never know what you like if you don't choose it."

This one conversation, this one moment, changed my life. I would never know me until I opened the line of communication with myself. I found a dialogue with me in the choices that I made. It wasn't about a right or wrong choice, it wasn't about looking perfect it was about the conversation. Choosing things that seemed fun for me were all the sentences and paragraphs that began my story of a different kind of self- exploration. It started with restuarants, hikes, walks, yoga, and eventually led up to traveling, exploring the country, and moving to a whole different state.

In my present life most people are interested in the How of it,

"How do you choose for you? How do you get there?"

Quite honestly, the only thing I have to tell them is that there isn't a how, there is just choice. This was the part that left me shaking in my boots as I looked ahead at the next adventure. There was nothing to figure out, there was only a question of "What's next?" and the choice to follow that.


  • Each day find one thing you would like to choose and choose it. No matter what it is, no matter whether someone else thinks it's cool, just choose it.

One thing to remember as you begin your own adventure, you are never starting from scratch. All of you who are reading this choose a million things for yourself ALL. THE. TIME! From your clothing, to your coffee, to your job, to what you want to watch on TV. You have had the power all along my friends, now, what if you could use that power to create the life you have been waiting for?

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